Happy Women’s Day

Happy International Women’s Day…
To all the women whose lives have been prematurely cut short in broad daylight, dark places, horrible circumstances solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day…
To those who have had to contend with the visible and invisible scars of violence based solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day…
To those living on the brink and barely existing, forced to, targeted by love for others, coercion and the trappings of their economic status solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day…
To those who lost and lost and found opportunities to live and thrive even when the environment works against them solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day…
To those loving, living, being, creating solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day…
To those we know and do not know solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day…
To those we acknowledge and dismiss solely because they choose to be or are women.

Happy International Women’s Day
To those who may not even know that today is International Women’s day.


the sense in sensuality

Too much tiktok
I know because I transitioned from sleeping to waking
to the imagined audio of the videos of the same things on repeat
and I stopped
After berating myself for yet another task not yet done,
For allowing my distraction to take over
For choosing the distraction and going numb in the in-between
Until a spark of emotion reminds me
What am I doing?
I take a drive with the window down
singing along to the music
no longer wishing for someone to see me.
dancing in traffic in time to the lyrics.
I come home to the scent of something sicky sweet,
I knew it before I knew it and breathed it in,
I checked to confirm far away from what was near.
The almost overripe bananas I did not yet eat
I sat in the anticipation
In the dark of this night illuminated by the soft light of screens
the movement of my fingers instinctually, moving and tapping
the languid and graceful motions as they reach for letters
the resulting rhythm of the mechanical press of the keys.
I am at home and hunched over,
relaxed and looking to name this feeling and not wanting to name it
In waiting for the tea to come down to the right temp
I fear that, while not cold, it is no longer hot enough for me to enjoy.
Alone, I am discovering some of me.



Do the thankless work
That no one will acknowledge
Lest you burn out from constantly performing for their attention.

Do the necessary work
That no one will see
Lest you forget your inherent value.

Do the unglamorous work
That no one will praise
Lest you lose yourself to seeking approval.

Do the dirty work
That everyone avoids
Lest you unleash your bile on others.

Do the messy work
That no one will see
Lest you lose your pearl and be a discarded shell.

Do the hard work
That no one truly wants to do
Lest you lay blame without cause.

Do the necessary work
That no one bothers to do
Lest you lose your will and get tossed about.

Do the silent work
That no one will hear
Lest you are left hoarse from shouting into nothingness.

Do the work you think is beneath you
That no one will let you forget
Lest you forget the contributions that allow you to live as you do.

Do the uncharacteristic work
That no one can point to
Lest you trade your individuality for conditional acceptance.

Do the inner work
That no one can take from you
Lest you rest precariously on the brittle foundations of vanity.

Do the outer work
That no one else can do for you
Lest you forget your agency to thrive.


Lipstick stains on my mug

Sipping carefully
The tea is hot,
It may transfer,
and leave lipstick stains on my mug

Selfie upon selfie,
She knows the look is right
Moisturizer, liner, blot, lipstick, blot…
So leave lipstick stains on my mug.

Will they notice and compliment her,
Will they think it looks good, and remain silent,
Or think it looks bad, and remain silent,
about the lipstick stains on my mug.

For trying too hard for too little,
For worrying too much about everyone else
When she is gone; the lip will stay,
stamped by the lipstick stains on my mug



Follow the path without knowing where it leads

Encounter yourself as you are, dispensing who you think you should be.

Avoiding fear is the trouble, acknowledging it is work

Remember you are worthy, especially without evidence.


The peril of wanting


I hide,
I elude,
I build,

Yet, They threaten to betray me,
To collapse this elaborate house of cards
Set against an unstable brick wall,

My energies perpetually expended,
There is just enough room for vague suspicion,
And terror of outright discovery,

Discovery, the great peril of want,
I yearn for its sweet release,
While at ease in its absence,

I am dangling precariously,
Posing unconvincingly,
Failing spectacularly.


Small hours

Quiet long inhale
Small irregular exhale
The heat of breath against my skin
In the small hours
Twitching fingers
Hands, thighs, everything,
Heavy with ease
Unencumbered by appearances
I am awake
You are asleep
Careful not to wake you
Drinking in this touch
When you did not set out to touch.


Teach me

Teach me to cry,
to let my tears flow,
to let go.

Teach me to speak,
I’m hoarse from silencing,
I am tired of hiding.

Teach me to touch,
without an agenda,
for the sake of wonder.

Teach me to be naked,
to be lathered in oil,
and not recoil.

Teach me to want,
to give it a try,
before its time to die,

Teach me to be,
there is far too much doing,
barely any being.

Teach me to care,
enough to learn,
enough to forget.



Working from right to left
Unsullied by difficulty
Draining defilement
Unfailingly mindful

Bathed by fountains of sand or water
Ablutions completed wasting nothing
Purified ritually
Thoroughly cleansed
Illuminated white upon my head and feet
Zealously forward towards those doors
Ensured to freely partake


Good girl

I have but one goal,
Follow your lead,
To do as I’m told,
To sit silently and wait,
Or writhe wildly and call.
I promise I’ll be a good girl.

Please don’t deny me,
I’ll be a picture of discipline,
The training is never truly complete,
Appropriately presenting,
The scene is set.
I want to be a good girl.

With eyes closed,
Lips parted,
I’ll follow the growl beneath your orders,
Safe and secured
I’ll be bound here, afloat here.
Make me a good girl.

Open for you,
Arched to you,
After the glistening drop,
I will care for you,
You will care for me.
And I will be a good girl.

When life calls us back,
To obligatory necessities,
Call me at a random time.
Absently regarding these marks,
Trembling and unsettled.
Tell me I am a good girl.